You may have learnt everything you know about social etiquette in pre-school, but we likely didn’t all attend the same pre-school.  In fact, the geographical location of said pre-school would have had a huge impact on what we learned and what we now classify as ‘proper’ and ‘acceptable’ or ‘inappropriate’ behaviours. Manners and social norms alike differ greatly based on the communities, the countries and the environments we were brought up in. It may be as simple as tonality, or it may be as far reaching as overall body language, for example a thumbs up.

The world is becoming a much smaller place and a greater number of people will live and work in other places then the ones in which they grew up and subsequently became accustomed to. We speak of ‘culture shock’ in some cases and while globalization may mean that we have become more exposed to differing customs and the shock is subdued, there will still be a period of adaption.  There will be a need on our part to feel out the various norms and adapt accordingly and the same is true of the social web in general, but particularly for those that are engaging on a global scale and across various industries, something which Cindy King writes about extensively.

Subtleties can be OBVIOUS

The reality is that we may not be confrontational, or there may not be an issue at hand, but rather simple miscommunication based on our own framework of how we convey an idea and interact, can mislead others. As such it is likely that there may be sociological factors at play for certain communication mishaps rather than an actual differing of opinions. In addition to this the social web as we discussed earlier this month, means that we are communicating without verbal clues. Sarcasm may be lost entirely and any pointers will go unnoticed behind a screen.

Beyond the online world this will also impact our day to day. We’ve all had emails in the past that we may have thought of as antagonistic. PERHAPS SOMEONE EVEN USED CAPS LOCK IN THIS EMAIL which to you may have conveyed an air of urgency which you didn’t appreciate when perhaps they were simply trying to draw your attention to something in order to be helpful. All of these factors weigh heavily in social etiquette because the way we perceive something will inform the way in which we approach it and eventually reach out or respond to it. Having lived in many countries it’s become apparent to me that in these cases an exercise in caution is key. The benefit of the doubt can be hugely helpful and in most cases ensure that issues don’t arise where there shouldn’t be any to begin with.

DON’T stick to your guns

While we may be entirely engrossed in our online lives, this means picking up the phone. It means taking a non-confrontational approach in response to someone who might come across as being confrontational and it means understanding that there may be other issues at play than what you think. What social networks are popular and how you engage on them will be starkly different from country to country as Brian Solis covered a while ago but more to the point, behaviors will differ. Some societies may be centered around collaboration,  whereby lending a helping hand even if you weren’t invited to will be well received, while in other more individualistic societies it might be denoted as intrusive. The reality is that navigating social media is not always straightforward at the best of times, and this gets enhanced when a sole individual or team is engaging across multiple countries. A measured approach, openness and adaptability can go a long way in helping you tread with caution, learn as you navigate and take on the necessary approaches to be successful across cultures, industries and the web.

We’d love to hear from you. What have your experiences been in communicating across social networks and across cultures? Have you had to adapt your approach?

Tags: Brian Solis, Cindy King, Community, Social Etiquette, Social Media